Parents Are Pretty Much Inconsequential

April 23, 2009

“That there be no immoral or godless person like Esau, who sold his own birthright for a single meal. For you know that even afterwards, when he desired to inherit the blessing, he was rejected, for he found no place for repentance, though he sought for it with tears.” – Hebrews 12:16-17

Esau and Jacob. Same mother, same father, twins. Raised the same way with the same belief system. But you would never meet two more diverse persons on the face of the earth.

When you have children of the same sex that are close in age, there are going to be some very fascinating dynamics. They have come from the same parents. They’ve been raised in the same household. How can they be so incredibly different? But every child is unique and has to be parented differently. A parent will often lament to me about problems they’re having with one child while another child is doing splendidly. The parent will say, “You know, pastor, I’ve raised ’em the same way.” And I think to myself, “That’s the problem.” You cannot raise any child the same way and expect it to be a fruitful venture. Children are not robots. They each have their own unique talents, individual interests and varying temperaments.

Remember, parents, only God knows the ultimate plan He has for our children. Only He knows how it’s going to ultimately play out. The role of the parent is to seek to shape our children and to understand how to parent them uniquely. We raise them with love, fairness, discipline, and teaching in hopes that our children will one day be able to grasp the grace of God. We pray that one day they’ll come to the realization that they are sinners and do not deserve God’s favor or blessing. We pray that they claim the grace of God, and allow Him to transform their life through Jesus Christ. And in the process, some of our children are going to choose to claim that grace and repent, and some are not. Do your best, pray for God’s guidance, and leave the results in the hands of God.